As I make this year’s list of gifts that will be played with for an hour and forgotten about…
If you give a kid a cookie,
he’ll ask for a some cake to go with it.
In order to make his point,
he’ll cross his arms and stomp his foot.
Stomping his foot will remind him that he needs a new pair of gym shoes.
He’ll point out that the gym shoes he wants are only $125.
Listening to you explain why $125 is a lot of money for shoes that will only be worn on Tuesdays
will remind him that you are The Worst Mom Ever.
He will then list the reasons why you are The Worst Mom Ever.
Topping the list will be the fact that all the other kids have iPhones.
Talking about how all the other kids have iPhones will remind him to ask if he can have an iPhone.
You will point out that he doesn’t need an iPhone and besides, he…
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